Monday, January 9, 2012

My New Project...

Life.

2012 has started to be a great year...
and a sad year.

2012 started off with Hunter recuperating from surgery...
being the absolute amazing, incredible little girl that she is.
I say this not to make you jealous...
but I do live life truly believing everyone should be blessed enough to have a Hunter...
and that somewhere in my life I did something so incredibly wonderful...
that pleased God so much...
that he chose me to be her mother.
I can't help it...
I make no apologies...
she is amazing.

And so far...
2012 has seen Dinky cutting his hair...
in the very center of his forehead...
almost to the scalp.
He looks kind'a funny.

2012 has seen Robert going to his first boy/girl party...
not including pre-k and kindergarten...
everyone gets invited those years...
but this was the first one he was invited to by a girl...
who isn't even in his class...
and he wanted to go.
Though he did call to ensure that she had no dogs before he left...
it could have changed everything if she had said "Yes".
Girlfriend?
He says "No"...
and I say "Thank you"...
I'm not ready.
Neither is he...
he usually forgets to brush his hair each morning.
But her parents loved him...
wanted to keep him and has invited him back anytime...
he says he's going back.
She loved his gift...
he picked it out himself...
and her parents even said it beat out their gift for her...
tickets to Big Time Rush with backstage passes!
He bought her a Monster High doll and watch...
don't ask because I have no idea...
but apparently it's the new rage for 10 year old girls.

2012 is the year that Haley is going to take up a foreign language...
more for the challenge than anything else...
she's decided to start with a (hopefully) fairly easy one...
Gaelic.
A nod to her very Irish heritage.

And then Friday evening I received a phone call.
My cousin...
a year younger than me...
one that our childhood's are so deeply intertwined that one could not be without the other...
had very suddenly died.

We've not been close in recent years...
we grew up and have our own lives...
commitments...
and unfortunately...
her and I didn't actually share a lot of things in common.
We lived very different lives.
Doesn't mean I ever stopped loving her...
she was family.
We don't ever have to agree or approve how someone lives their life...
just be there to support...
to pick up when they fall...
giving a hug and kind word...
when they need it.
We're family.

And now she's gone.
Her mother and father...
her children...
her brother and sisters...
are trying to make sense out of a cruel twist of fate.

The last couple of days I've been searching through old photos for pictures of her...
of us when we were much younger...
and that searching led me to a decision.

I have watched Michelle Wooderson and her Project Life for the last year...
have thought numerous times to start it myself...
but always coming to the decision that I was just too busy...
no time to take on yet another project...
that my life was too mundane.
nothing exciting...
just the every day stuff.
So many excuses.

No more.

That mundane...
that is my life!
And I love every moment of it.
I never want to forget it...
I want to treasure each and every day.
And someday...
when the kids are grown...
living their own lives...
I want to live this one over again.
I want to sit and touch these moments in time...
to remember Hunter's first smile when waking from surgery...
Dinky's horrid self haircut...
Robert's blush when asked about this little girl...
Haley's first language lesson...
because this is my life.

So with love-of-my-life's blessing...
I ordered Becky Higgins Project Life.
I got Clementine...
should be here next week...
and now...
something that I thought I was too busy to take on...
I can't wait to start.

I already know that I'll do the simple...
weekly version...
or at least that's how it will start...
who really knows where it will go from here.
And I'll share a little along the way.
Glimpses into my very mundane...
unexciting life...
but the life I love.

Life is...
too short.
Too precious.
And I don't want to miss another moment in this life.













9 comments :

Joyce said...

Oh, Renee. I'm so sorry for your loss. Your cousin was much too young to be taken. What a sad story. I think doing project life sounds like it will be very healing for you. I look forward to seeing your posts about it.

Jeanne J said...

Renee, I enjoyed reading your post - hearing about how the children are growing and how life changes. I am sorry for your loss and agree with you that every moment is precious.

Marybeth said...

Renee, I'm so sorry for your loss . My heart goes out to you and her family at this time . I think it's so beautiful what you said about being the lucky one that God chose you to get Hunter, you are! I love that you know that! This life does go by so fast ! I can tell how much you enjoy your entire family.
Count your blessings instead of sheep, love that song! :) TFS.

Kristin said...

Renee, I am so very sorry for your loss. For your family's loss. Your and your family will be in my prayers. I just started PL too- I couldn't wait for Clementime (my fave) so I'm doing Amber this yr. and I *love* it. It's a natural fit into the life we live. Like PJ for my daughter. My son getting to watch a very cool movie for the first time ever. Two weeks and they already are looking at it. They know that they will be writing on cards to go in it, their school work and drawings will be in it. Nothing will diminish the pain of your loss but time and healing- but please know I count it a privilege to pray for you.

Kim said...

Renee...I am so sorry for your loss, you and your family are in my prayers. I jsut recently lost my aunt and we had such a wonderful relationship that it is still hard to deal with the fact that she is gone. I do know she is in a better place and that gives me comfort. I can't wait to see what you do with Project Life.

Sharron said...

Renee, I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your cousin. How sad for your family to lose someone still so young. It does remind us all that life is very precious and we never can predict how much time we have. At Christmas we were discussing family history and ways to record memories for the grandchildren. Everyone is faced with limited time for journals and scrapbooking. I knew very little about PL until you mentioned it so really appreciated the link--looks fabulous! I always love your sweet blog posts about your family. It will be so wonderful when you start getting things recorded in your PL journals too. Have fun!! HUGS!!

Kara said...

So sorry to hear about your cousin. It's nice to see you able to find a positive lesson to learn. I look forward to seeing bits and pieces of your everyday!

Kathy Mc said...

So true ~ life is too short. Live each day for today as tomorrow may never come. It's depressing if you think about it, but we can't wait till it's too late. Congrats on deciding to do Project Life. I'll look forward to seeing some blog posts about it. Sorry to read about your cousin's unexpected death. My condolences to you!

Amy said...

I too have thought about this especially with the kids growing up. Can't wait to see what you do with it. Glad Patrick "let you" buy PL!!

So sorry to hear of your cousin's passing.....such sad news.

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